Corona Chronicles – You Can Have These 9 Symptoms That Suck!

In July I wasn’t feeling well. What started as a slightly sore throat turned into a cough. The cough became so bad that my side hurt from coughing. I saw a doctor via video and she said, “It sounds like you may have bronchitis. I can’t give you any antibiotics until you are still coughing and sick for five more days. In the meantime, just as a precaution, I want you to take a COVID test.”

I believed it was probably bronchitis because I had these same symptoms years ago with a previous bout with bronchitis. The next day I was tested for COVID. As the days went by I became sicker. I begin to have trouble focusing while doing my job and completing assignments for my PhD classes. I was nauseous, vomiting and I had gastrointestinal issues. I was very tired and soon everything I tasted was nasty (even water) and the only smell I could smell was an ongoing burning smell.

It took ten days to receive my COVID test results and my results showed I had tested positive for COVID. I continued to feel horrible. I cried a few times because I felt so bad. I was sick sick! The symptoms were the same symptoms experienced with a cold, the flu and bronchitis. However, those same symptoms with COVID were worse than I have ever experienced. I would not wish COVID on anyone!

I was able to quarantine and recuperate at home. I’m thankful that I didn’t have to to be admitted to the hospital or be placed on a ventilator. COVID should not be taken lightly because it is serious. I know others that have battled COVID and survived, and I know others that have died as a result of COVID.

It took a good three weeks before I begin to feel like myself. Even though my primary care doctor said I didn’t have to take another COVID test, I took one to help me feel comfortable around others. My COVID test result showed I was negative for COVID!

Even though I was negative for COVID, my battle is not over. So many people are experiencing various after COVID symptoms that have led to life changing illnesses. I still have difficulty focusing. I don’t know if it will just get better or if I will need a medication to help me focus. The best way for me to demonstrate how difficult focusing has become is to share a recent situation.

For my PhD classes, but have to read multiple articles. The average article length is 20 pages. I was reading an article and I struggled throughout the article. It took me about three hours to read ten pages! I cried because this is new for me. Even with this lingering issue, I will not be defeated. I will have the victory over this difficultly focusing because God is in control! He has never let me down and He will equip me to be victorious!

I’m choosing to share my experience because COVID symptoms can be different for each person. I never had a fever, which has been one of the consistent symptoms that is shared concerning COVID. I did what we were told to do to lessen our risk of exposure and somewhere, somehow I was exposed. I’m sharing because it can happen to you. I’m sharing because if you test positive for COVID, I don’t want you to beat yourself up. I want your focus to be on getting well. I want you to be able to say I had COVID, but I beat it!

I’m Tired!

Almost every time another Black man is murdered, I think about when the Harvey police pulled my son over and pointed their guns in his face! He had done nothing wrong. He had just left Ingalls from visiting his dad after his dad’s surgery.

I think about how they could’ve murdered my son for nothing!! We would’ve probably never found out what really happened because folks were not recording like they are today. They would’ve tried to paint my son as a criminal. God protected my son that day!!

I have been mostly reflecting and not doing a lot of talking about what people should or should not be doing. I don’t have the answers and neither do you.

I know I’m tired! I’m tired of Black people being murdered by police. I’m tired of encountering racist behavior from others. I’m tired of white privilege. I’m tired of us being mistreated because of the color of our skin. I’m tired of having to navigate through this world in defensive mode ALL THE TIME!

I’m tired of folks who sit on high horses like they do everything right and use their platform to bash others for the choices they make. I’m tired of folks comparing what’s happening to the crime that happens in communities. It’s not the same! If I kill someone, I’m going to jail. Police don’t seem to have that same understanding.

I’m tired of folks want to speak out about how wrong the rioting is, but didn’t speak out about a Black man being murdered. I’m tired of folks who love Black culture, but don’t like Black people. I’m tired of these protest calisthenics: make your profile picture Black, don’t buy anything on this day, boycott this company, cancel this person and NOTHING has changed!

Black people are still being murdered by police, Black people are still being murdered by the local neighborhood racists, companies are still producing racially insensitive advertising and products, we are still being followed around stores, we are still being questioned about why we are in certain spaces, we are still being falsely accused and imprisoned, and we are still having to fight to wear the hair that grows out of our heads! I AM TIRED!

Happy National Teacher Appreciation Day!

To every teacher that reads this Happy National Teacher Appreciation Day! Thank you for being the catalyst that turned on the lightbulb of learning! Many years from now your students will remember how you cared and what they learned from you.

Teaching is a superpower!

Good teachers should be appreciated. I teach college courses and there’s no experience like witnessing the learning lightbulb turn on for a student!

My favorite teacher was Mrs. Champion. She was my 8th grade teacher. She’s gone, but she will never be forgotten. She was the one that turned on my love for learning and taught me to always do my best. Mediocre was unacceptable! She has left a lasting imprint on my life. Even after I graduated, she still cared and wanted to know what I was doing. She bought my son a baby shower gift. Thank you Mrs. Champion for everything!

Reflections (2019)…

Rejection – I have experienced several rejections in my professional life. Rejections that I still don’t fully understand why I was rejected, but God knows why I was rejected.

Great personal loss – A few people that impacted my life I didn’t expect to be gone are gone. It still doesn’t seem real that they are gone. I’m so grateful that these folks left their imprint on my life and will forever be missed.

Difficult decision – I had to make a difficult spiritual decision that I didn’t foresee having to make. If I would’ve been told in 2017 or 2018 that this decision would be made in 2019, I would not have believed it.

New life – Excited about my next grand-baby!

FiftyI turned 50! I see this age as new beginnings, new experiences, and new goals.

Finishing what I started – I started working on my PhD and then had to stop. I had resigned myself to never completing my PhD – but God! 2020 will include me beginning to finish what I started!

This year has been filled with the good, the bad and the ugly. Some things were set up to knock me down. I stumbled and tripped, but I didn’t fall! Some things were set up to destroy me l, but I was not destroyed! I know that God protects and cares about me. God favors me and is expecting great things from me!

Forward!

Clear Your Mind

We are consumed daily with so much noise that we can’t take the time to think. Think about our goals, plans and dreams for our futures. We are inundated with so much that’s nothing but noise. I call noise anything that doesn’t allow you to focus on what you should be focusing.

We have to carve out time for ourselves to just think. My best thinking and ideas happen while I’m walking. I love walking. By my job there’s a forest preserve trail that I walk to clear my mind. As I’m walking, I look at nature and I’m just in awe of what God has created. I’m able to hear. Hear from God, hear my thoughts and plans. I have a peace that I can’t explain while walking. Walking centers me.

I notice things that I wouldn’t normally notice because I’m moving too fast or focusing on the wrong things. On one of my afternoon walks I met my friend below.

I couldn’t even remember the last time I saw a turtle. A turtle! He was just moving along as if he didn’t have a care in this world. I thought to myself I need to have the attitude of a turtle – moving at my own pace and not caring about what others are doing. Focusing on myself and making sure I’m doing what I’m supposed to do.

Below are some other picture I’ve taken on my walks:

Let’s talk. What works best for you to clear your mind?

Living My Best Life!

I started the morning of Chapter 50 eating breakfast with family and friends. I want to thank you for all the birthday wishes that were received in every form.

I wanted to go somewhere that was on my bucket list of places to go and never been before for my 50th. NOLA was my choice. I wanted to celebrate with my family and friends. Everyone couldn’t make it, but I’m having a blast with everyone that was able to make it.

I’m excited about my future. This birthday has been one of my best! I received one of the best gifts ever! Fifty looks good on me. I mean I do look good period! Here me roar – ROAR!! I love me – flaws and all. My theme this entire year is BETTER! Every day I’m striving to be BETTER.

I have another item I want to check off my bucket list this year – learning to swim. I’ll be finding a class to help me on my quest to be BETTER!

PS – LEO SEASON IS NOT OVER💁🏽‍♀️💁🏽‍♀️☺️☺️

Marriage Is A Triathlon – Not A Sprint!

Recently, I was watching a video about training for a triathlon. A triathlon is a race that is split into three different activities: swimming, biking and running. Let me provide my disclaimer that I’m not ready for a triathlon. First, I have to learn how to swim. Learning how to swim is on my 2019 bucket list.

Back to triathlon training. I was curious about the preparation for a triathlon. After watching the video, I realized that preparing for a triathlon is similar to preparing for a lasting marriage. Let me explain.

You can’t just wake up one morning and go complete a triathlon! There’s some preparation involved. That preparation requires commitment. You have to decide to train so many times a week in preparation for the triathlon. Marriage takes commitment. You have to take your vows seriously and be committed to demonstrating your vows by your actions.

A triathlon requires dedication. There will be some days you don’t feel like training. There will be some days you would rather be spending your time doing something else. There will be days you won’t like training. However, you have to train anyway and remain dedicated to being prepared for the triathlon.

Marriage requires dedication. There will be some days that you don’t want to be married. There will be some days you don’t like your spouse. There will be some days you would rather be doing something else. When those days come and trust me they will, you have to remain dedicated to your marriage.

A triathlon requires some essential gear: a bike, helmet, shoes, swimming cap, goggles and a trisuit to name a few. Without the essential gear, you hinder your chances of doing your best. You want to do your best.

There’s some essential marriage gear: love, good communication, good sex, honesty, God and prayer to name a few. If you don’t have the essential marriage gear, it will be difficult to have a lasting marriage. Essential marriage gear is necessary and beneficial to a good marriage.

A good marriage deserves a good foundation. A good foundation begins with commitment, dedication and the essential gear. Are you ready for your triathlon?

If You’re the Toxic Friend and You Know It, Clap Your Hands!

Recently, one of my friends asked this question on Instagram: “How do you know who is toxic?” My short response was you bring their toxic ways to their attention and they don’t try to change their ways. You find yourself in a constant struggle of not talking to them for awhile versus talking to them on a regular basis. It seems they act better after a hiatus, but alas their old toxic self shows up!

I used to believe toxic people didn’t know they were toxic. However, as I’ve matured I recognize they know their toxic and they don’t care. You know why they don’t care? They don’t care because they have the number one characteristic of a toxic person – they are selfish!

Their selfish ways show up constantly. Every activity has to revolve around them. Every conversation has to revolve around them, or they make the conversation about them.

You call the toxic person to vent about something you’re going through and this is how the conversation goes: First, they compare what you’re going through with something they have went or are going through. Then, somehow the conversation turns to be all about them! After you finish the conversation, you feel worse than you felt before you called them.

Another characteristic of toxic people is they are always the victim. Someone is always doing them wrong. They don’t do anything to anyone. They mind their business 🙄🙄. You know these are all lies because you know this person! They never take responsibility for their actions.

Then, toxic people like to monopolize your time. They want to be your ONLY friend. They don’t get along with any of your other friends. As a result, you can’t invite them to group outings. The toxic person not getting along with your other friends is their way to monopolize your time.

Furthermore, toxic people are users. Most of the time you interact with them, they need something. If you analyze your relationship, you will notice the toxic person always wants something from you. The relationship seems to always be you giving and the toxic person always taking.

Finally, another classic toxic person characteristic is they are never happy for you. If you tell them about your new job, they have to mention they wanted to work for that company and they didn’t get the job. They say you must know someone that works at the job. When you tell them about your financial increase, they have to mention how they need the increase more than you need the increase.

Toxic people leave you feeling drained surrounded with negativity. Their words and actions make you question your self-esteem and worth. The reality is the relationship is built on a foundation of jealousy. You may be wondering can any good come out of this relationship?! Yes, it can!

Here’s the good: As you grow and mature, you recognize toxic relationships have no place in your circle. You recognize there is nothing wrong with severing toxic ties and moving on with your life. You will more quickly identify toxic people before you have invested your time and energy in them.

If you read this post and recognize yourself, you are the toxic friend so clap, clap! Now that you see yourself, what are you going to do about it?

For those that have or have had toxic friends, how did you determine your friend was toxic? What did you do about it? Let’s talk about it.

Broken Humans

Broken as defined in the dictionary, “having been fractured or damaged and no longer in one piece or in working order.” Brokenness means “Forcibly separated into two or more pieces; fractured.” As you read those two definitions, you might have thought about a time that you were broken or in a state of brokenness. You may still be broken or in a state of brokenness. I’m here to tell you that you don’t have to remain broken or continue to be in a state of brokenness.

When we are broken, it’s difficult to continue on our life’s journey. Being in a constant state of brokenness hinders our ability to move on. As a result, the relationships we form doing our times of brokenness have a tendency to be broken.

These relationships are built on brokenness and once we choose to move from our place of brokenness the relationships cannot withstand our path to being whole. For this reason, we should not begin a new relationship while broken. We need to be working on being made whole.

Whole is being “in an unbroken or undamaged state; in one piece.” Being whole seems impossible but we can be once again be whole. What does it take to be made whole?

First, we have to be honest with ourselves and recognize we are operating from a place of brokenness. We sometimes wonder why we are so angry or almost anything can have us crying. We are broken.

Second, we have to want to be whole. If you don’t want to be whole, it doesn’t make sense to lie to ourselves and others that we want to be whole. It’s better to wait until you’re ready. I have needed to lose weight for years, but until I was ready I wasted my time along with the time of others. Now, I’m focused on being healthy and making continuous progress. You have to do whatever you decide to do for you!

Third, seek help. Do not be ashamed to admit you need help. There’s nothing wrong with going to counseling, finding a support group for your brokenness and even reading self-help books. I encourage you to see a professional therapist.

Once we are beyond our broken state, we will be able to see the scars from the healed wounds and help someone else. We can have healthy relationships built on trust and respect. We can be happy and free! We can be whole:

My Spirit Animal is A Sloth

 

Recently, one of my coworkers went to an event to see a sloth.  She was able to meet and interact with a sloth.  I looked at the pictures she posted of the sloth and realized I have some similarities to sloths and there is a sloth characteristic that I want to embrace.

First, sloths are nocturnal.  Sloths are their most active at night.  That’s me!  I perform my best at night.  I think more clearly and have some of my best ideas at night.  I am most active at night.  I seem to have a burst of energy at night.  When most people are probably sleeping, I have found something to occupy my time, as if I don’t have to go to work in the morning.  

Second, sloths move the least during the day.  I am not a morning person.  I fake it until 10am. On the days I am off from work, I am content to lie in my bed all day.  If I have no plans for the day, I will lay in my PJ all day and, I’m not ashamed to say, will not brush my teeth or bathe.  I’m content to limit my movement!  Oh to be a sloth and be able to have my least movement during the day!

Have you seen the movie Zootopia?  One of my favorite scenes is when Nick Wilde and Judy Hopper go to the DMV.  They are trying to get the name of a car owner using the license plate information.  They are in a hurry and want to receive the information and go.  The sloth in this scene is hilarious!  He acts like he doesn’t have a care in this world and is in no hurry.  He has a nonchalant attitude: https://youtu.be/0woPde7OE1k

This picture taken by my friend reminds me of the sloth in Zootopia. 

The sloth is chilling with his panda bear as if he has no worries.  He is living his best sloth life!  That’s the attitude I want to have in life.  I want to live my best life and not allow anything to hinder me from living my best life.  I want to march to the beat of my own drum.  I want to be different and not care that others may have a problem with me being different.  I want to move through life at my own pace and not allow myself to be up in arms about anything.  What about you?  Which animal is your spirit animal?